Just before I was heading off to sleep, I decided to experiment something. A friend of mine Charles Wilbur Johnson posted a veggie post on his profile. When I went to share it on my profile, it warned me about Privacy settings of the User. I usually dismiss it. In the past, when I attempt to share it onto a particular user such as my sis, it doesn’t’ let me. So dats grand. But something else was telling me. I used Facebook’s View As feature to view as my sis. So whatever she sees on my profile. But to my surprise she wasn’t able to see the Veggie post. So then I asked her in question via Messenger. And same thing. So I downloaded the pic and uploaded a separate photo. So she should be able to see it now.
Well what can I say, but only one word. Productive. Well perhaps another one for yee all, Happy. Never have I been so mentally stable as I have been unstable in the past few weeks/months etc., This occurred or at least started to occur when my sleep started to get worse and worse by means of failing to sleep immediately or as I said previously “hitting the pillow”. So let me lay out how it started out.
It started by me getting up at at 6pm instead of 5. I was due to meet my sis for 6pm, instead I got up at that time. Kinda funny. hahaha. The reason being, was I had set my alarm for 5.15AM instead of pm. I only realsied this when I checked out why my alarm wasn’t going off. I heard another loud bang at my door. Namely my mother. I was still twisting and turning. Like out of 5hr sleep(of which I was suppose to), I only slept less than an hr. Now can anyone blame me as to why I’m late for ppl or errands etc.,
So now to the unfolding of the day.
I then headed on my way. I had to get milk for my sis(Well technically I leave my milk in her place, cause I can’t handle her milk and for veganism reasons too. So I went to Centra when realsiing that Tescos wasn’t on my route journey. So I looked for the Soya milk which is what I take. I noted I couldn’t see anything, so I asked the Shop Assistant for it. He pointed me to a shelf whereby the soya milk was NOT in the fridge area as to where I would expect it. So I went ahead to to pay for it. Then headed onto my journey.
I eventually arrived at my sis. Mom was parked there. She wanted me to pop into the car. She wanted a chat with me. To leave my phone on, to send a card to my god mother Ailish. I expressed genuinely the fall she endured recently. I said to Mom that she never contacts me, so why get her a card. etc., She then asked if I had eaten the Cottage Pie she had cooked up. I said I left it behind aka I hadn’t eaten it. I had some how come out with that I can’t trust her with the meat aspects. She then says why don’t I get the packaging that has it put on the product in question. I said that’s still no good. She could still put meat in it. So she then admits to having putting chicken in the soup on her birthday. I was most disgusted but more so appalled. I know shes trying for my best and loves me and all, but GEEZ let me have a space. Its a factor as to why I moved out.
I then said to my sis, that I should start letting my feelings out to somebody, as my legs were killing me, with all the feelings in me body being heavying on the body. So I started reading out some of my blog entries to my sis from the Romanian Dream to my Post Office distraughtification and the tragic circumstances of the GNIB Debacle. So as you can see quite a hella of a lotta on me mind int he last week come to think of it.
While discussing the above, to decrease any tensions in my mind, considering my back pain was coming back with a vengeful but even worse my legs, I had told my sis about a post I had posted during the week, I think yesterday, a pic of a VERY old Film camera, and the saying said “Share if you know what this is?”. I had posted and asked my fellow buddies, if they could help me out. Of course they helped me out, of which I was very appreciative. However a mate of mine post a pic of an American Flag on a US Stamp and asked me if I knew what the pic he posted was. I replied(Knowingly what it was), ask a stupid question and get a stupid answer. I went on by seeing is it a some form a flag can’t make out what it is. His response was priceless. “Joking Right”. I literally had the heartiest laugh. Of which I hadn’t in a very long time. No wonder I adore my Facebook buddies. Great laughs, cries, sadness etc., They’s my buddies for life.
Then later on just before my sis n I went out for a walk, she wanted to get a few things. She asked whats this post it not saying “A9 5.00”. I said in a laughing and joking mater. “Anal at 5pm” Well we had the heartiest laugh. hahaha. It was priceless.
So shortly before I left, I asked my sis something of a trivial question: “Can she remember any good happy memorys of Mom”. She said she does. When she was on the hammock one summer of 29c. She remembers having a heartiest non negative chat ie positive chat. She wholly enjoyed her company. She has hatred towards the relatives. She has made this known over the years in particular. I then replied for my version I am complete OPPOSITE in that I unfortunately and regret to say that I DON’T have any good memories(just bad or unpleasant memories) of mom. It was revealed that both Mom and Dad have a love/hate relationship between both of us. It was no surprise to learn of this. Considering we were constantly battling our freedom, our views. I said in a previous post on my OLD Facebook, that my parents asked that I vote for a particular political party. Here’s my exact status: “I was also told to vote for a particular political party. I shall not stand for this. I fought against it. We are the Republic of Ireland 2010. We are a Democratic Society which means WE HAVE A RIGHT TO OUR OPINIONS, A RIGHT TO VOTE WHO WE WANT NOT WHAT A PARTICULAR PERSON SAYS.” So basically I have more memories for the relatives hence why I keep blabbering about em(in both negative and positives) as I have more good memories such as when I got sunburnt in Newbridge Desmenae with the Dots(Dohertys). My sis wasn’t with us. Don’t know where she was come to think of it. Buy as with my folks, Well mom anyways I don’t have any great or fond memories of her. Sadly. Me Paps I do, Indeed. Well Gardening wise. As my sis puts its “sweet” looking at two old fogies me da n myself chatting and chatting. Aww memories. But Mom nope can’t even think of a good think let alone a memories. So bottomline, I always got on great with my Dad and my Mom’s Relatives. But Mother herself, not so much. I was her Golden boy alrite. Don’t get me wrong, we didn’t fight constantly but nothing worthy to remember.
So shortly before I left, I then noticed that my leg wasn’t as a bad as when I had arrived. I was in aching with my legs. Or as I described to my sis, “not as soar, but still soar”. So thinking about it, All I had to do was simply TALK. Let my feelings out. To do this I read out some of my entries to my sis and then we discuss some of the entries. So with a heavy load was lifted off my soldiers.