Diary 1st January 2016 – New Years Day

PS THIS POST CONTAINS GRAPHIC CONTENT

Well today was not bad a day. After last night’s celebrations, of which my main aim was to try and forget what my pops said to my sis n I back on Stephen’s Day. So afterwards,  I got up after MORE lack of sleep for a dinner with Mom, Dad, Maureen and my sis. The Mulligans were up their when we arrived. heheeh. They were heading on up to Eileens for a meal or something. hehehhe.

So then after the meal, we all dispersed. I headed for my 24hr sleep. Which is quite true when you think about it. hahaha.

One of the dreams that I had was that I’m with a friend in a classroom or some building. The friend is shot several times in front of my eyes. I then am questioned by the cops as to what exactly happened. One of the questionings, I’m at a tourism item my Mom on some boat or about to hope on one that shows us Flowers on the tour. While writing one of the explanations on paper, for the cops, I break down, with my paper in front of my face hiding my emotions. So it is with great regret that Mom n I have to let the tourism boat to someone else.

Then thoughts arrived of which one was to go and ask my sis for advise on Sleepers as she calls em, then another horrific one is as follows:

A severe thought enters my brain when I recall my drink being spiked or at least being worried about it. Then afterwards  I then wakeup with a gun to my head when I wanna escape. 2 girls r raping me. One sticks a thread down the slit of my penis while the other is sucking it. Then I attempt to escape but the gun is still on my forehead. So somehow I escape naked. Wanting someone to run me over doesn’t work so I attempt to jump off Luke Kelly bridge. However realising no ones around I walk into the Mater naked  and scream that I was raped by two lesbians. So in the meantime I puncture something in my arm and have at it by means of scissoring the skin.

I have noticed thou that I have been failing to sleep immediately the way I used to. I had buckets of blankeies on me, not even that did the job. So I put Kathleen and my Sammy atop me. OH it made me feel loved again. heheeheh

Another thought that I had is that for 2016, I just need to know truthfully why I was given up. SO for the “truthful” as much as possible. The minute Maureen gives me the number. I will ring the person who was in charge of the foster process. I understood she was in contact with Marina. heehhe. So my next Puppys or whatever I’ll be getting will be called Marina. ie my Birth Mom’s name.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s