Diary 6th January 2016 – Feast of the Epiphany(Three Wise Men visited Jesus in the Manger); Women’s Christmas

Little humour to start off the blog, hahaha, as I was writing the above Blog title, literally, I got a fit of the giggles. I recalled a quote from Mrs. Brown’s Boys Christmas Special ’14. Mrs. Brown herself says:

“Wise!!!They got fucken lost”, what a class quote from her shows.

The Feast of the Epiphany aswell as being a religious aspect is actually also a day for the women, ie Women’s Christmas or in Irish Nollaig na mBán. You may also hear down through your travels Nollaig Beag which means Little Christmas. Women’s Christmas was actually started in Co. Cork and continens to be an Irish Tradition.

And now back onto me, hheheeheh,

I struggled along to get out of bed for Social welfare, sure who would. hahaha. But that said thou I was saying to meself, could I try tomorrow Thurs, but NO cause Dad wants my sis n I for the decorations to yank your chain down, hahha, Friday assuming he wants me at least back on Friday for the outside lights, ehhehehe so that would be a no no. I said I have to get up for the sake of the payments and more so my bank. Like at the time of writing I was €189 in DR aka DR. So I proceeded to go on in and then head to see Social Welfare. I’d prefer if I didn’t but hey, nothing can be done. Besides my legs were killing me going in let alone going out. The guy then told me everything’s in order. TO come back for the final time. He proceeded to give me an envelope and went to post it. I said that I wasn’t ready for it. I’ve to get details as in Checklists ie I was to get my statements from the Bank and the Credit Union. So he told me come back with everything next week. I then asked, do I have to come in everyweek, like and he said it’ll be put into the Post Office. So he told me come back with everything and that he’ll post my DA for me. When he asked that I sign the checks ie the payments, he noted I was a leftie. heheheh. He also noted to me that If I had come back  a  day late that I would missed a payment. He was the exact same guy who clearly is gay who upset me the day I broke in front of the family. Hence why I have a +Furry Babys Stanescu called Kathleen as my mom cried into my arms comforting me.

I then proceeded to head to the bank AIB to lodge my checks in. Still worrying thou no cash will go in, but nothing can be done thou. However at the same time I went in to get my statements for the Disability Allowance. Apparently it’ll cost me €3 per page for them to send it out to me. Which is quiet bizarre. So I went to the machine however I tried it but it just gave me ONE page, so I’ll try with my NEW card and pin.

Then I went to the Credit Union for again to get Statements from the savings account I have. Only realised that the loan had been payed off in November a week before social welfare were going on about on my case. Hmmm.

So then I came back and decided to head back to sleep. Then while sleeping a memory came back of whereby I was l listing of all the home alone movies I have. Home alone 3 I was studying it r whatever I had watched it when I came back from a boat trip on the StenaHSS. We went over to Holyhead, Wales,UK. In a cold wet Nov. We looked around. I bought r whoever a PC Game on a Floppy disk 💾 god b the days. It was a Christmas 🎅 quiz game 🎮   there was a question about Wet wet wet a music band.

I then woke up for a few hours to do the last two Home Alone films. heheehh

Then just as I wake up I gave myself a horrible trigger point whereby when I recalled Social Welfare upsetting me on Wed 23rd and Mom comforting me. Then in the thought, I rush out wanting to cry further, however Dad being obsessed with his Christmas Lights Bulbs, warns me not to step on the ligts as at the time in reality my sis and my Dad were doing up the lights when Mom n I came back. I accidentally or whatever step on one of them. Then Dad gets angry and I squabble up or crumble to a pancake kinda shape ie embryo more so. I scream “get away from me”. He then opens up and says come I want to hug you. So I in my infinite wisdom, actually go up and get hugged, however he continues to squeeze me rendering me breathless and then breaks my spinal chord in half. And then throws away my body like a rag doll down the bottom of the garden. My sis and Mom witness this and exclaim to the Emergency Services that “I have witnessed an actual murder”. Remember “A life is NOT replaceable whereas , Christmas Light Bulb IS replaceable”. So then I was putting on my Onesie, and I grabbed my sleeve and had at it and of course my arm while I was in teh toilet too. I was describing I use sleeves more so than arms. The arm is for private self harm or where no one is looking and the sleeve is ONLY for those who don’t judge me ie my sis.

Diary 23rd December 2015

Well today started off with a disappointment. Again I couldn’t get out of bed. Me thinks its because I’m surviving on Green Tea. and of course Chrisps, which is shortly on their way out too.

So that said I got up slightly later than anticipated. I then headed to meet Edmund for some bizarre reason I kept calling him Edward. I even put it on the card. Like wtf, like, or as the American’s puts it “ikr(I know right)”, hahaahah. So that said I then headed on off to meet him. It was slightly later than anticipated. I first went to AIB to withdraw cash. However the machine said “Unavailable”, so I checked to ensure its not the wrong card. I went inside to try and figure out what up. Then afterwards, I was assured its the right card. So I went to the teller to withdraw. Then I went to meet Edmund eventually. hahaaha. When I arrived another guy Ruairí was there. I never met him. So Edmund then said that he had to go for an event of “Anti-Christmas”, of which I took serious. Like I would imagine there are people against it. Like Atheists, for Meat reasons and animals etc., etc.,

So then I headed on back home. On the way, I wanted to get vegan dinner for myself for Christmas Day, however it wasn’t to be. I wanted to get stamps of trying to post two cards I left behind, in Ireland. Then I realised that I had the stamps with me all the time. But not the cards. I then came back home.

I was watching a few TV shows, then I headed on back out to first the Outhouse. I had planned on going to the Down to the Earth to see if I could get more Vegan Dinner food. As time was NOT on my side, I then headed to the Outhouse to deliver MORE cards. ahahha. I left them with Jamie. I chatted for a bit. heheheh. I then headed onto meet Todd for to see Star Wars. heheheh. Twas a pleasure seeing him again after all this time. I was disheartened to learn thou that he has been suffering depression as a result of his mother a few years ago, when he was back in Irl and she was over there, ie the US, that he couldn’t be with her. Something to that effect. So then I told him of my diagnosis. etc., I ain’t sure if its official thou. He brought up a soar spot of which was by no means his intention. How was he know. So I did a bit of self harm in the cinema toilets, the biting of rubber type and I saw something unusual so then I continuing having at it. Then after the film, I headed with him to his place.

I was lookinh aty my emails, sure whats’ new. hahahaah. I then came across a very interesitng article whereby it was desceribing an art Technostaglia whereby it’d releave our wonderous Dial-Up days, theren there was the ENcarta. God be the day, I’d go every week over the Dial-Up update Encarta on a Friday ngiht while looking at the Late Late or whatever with Mom n Dad. My Dad or Mom would wanna get the phone however it’d take it up the Internet. hahaha. Ahhh mememories.


Diary 20th June 2015

Still wandering what to do. I was suppose to go to the STI Screening event int he Outhouse also the Marry Me! event hosted by Dublin Gay Men’s Chorus. However with my feeling of being down, in the way, I didn’t bother. However, my sis called down to me to do a bit of downloading, so with that in mind, I got up let her in. And decided to head to the next event, being Gear Ireland’s PRIDE event. I was still apprehensive in what to wear. So I just picked two items of clothing. hahhaah. Running Shorts and a Tank top. I left my sis to her own accordance. I then headed off. With somewhat nervous as hell. That said I went into Fibbers where the month event is held, however I went to the wrong one. I went into the right one. I was charged €5 to get in. After 10 it would be €10. So I was bang on time. There wasn’t much people around. That said, few hanging around. I eventually got talking to a guy from Brazil but living in Washington DC. Twas lovely. Then to a lassy who was on a Holiday Visa for 90 Days. Pleasure talking to all. I then got talking to a third guy whom told me in a nice way to “take a hike”. As I said my Facebook profile “I know when am not wanted”. The regout I had on, as above described would NOT be sports gear. So as I said to my sis earlier on, it looks like the one that you’d have to spend a bomb on. Which clearly I don’t have. The shorts I had on were Running, and says I to the guy “aint’ Running not a shorts” his reply It ain’t “sexual” enough. Says I to meslef, that’s my bday in Gear outta the window. According tot he guy on any NORMAL night, I would have NOT got in. Today is a PRIDE Event. So for “inclusiveness” reasons, they literally allowed anyone in. But on a normal Gear night, I would NOT have been allowed in.

Diary 23rd May 2015


As I was passing Barneys pub, on the way to meet O’ Farrell in Ballsbridge Hotel, I remember I met Séamus in there with the group 20Somethings meeting a religious pilgrimage, whereby we met there to discuss a pilgrimage to Jerusalem. Mom understandably forbade me to go there with the conflict that was ongoing at the time.

Well what a day it turned out to be. After a historic vote, Ireland voted in favor of Marriage Equality. Citizens came home in their droves from all over the world to cast their vote that they are elegible. It was history in the making. I mean like IReland is the only country who voted by Popular Vote whcih means that Citizens of the country vote for a change to the Constitution ie Bunreacht na hÉireann. Over 1m citizens voted in favor of Marriage Equality. It was passed by a landslide. Vincent Brown himself had a special results show Live in the George. Or as he puts “iconic” gay bar. As such it was my intention to go their. Then onto Dublin Castle. However I had gone to bed too late, So I wasn’t able to get out. So I instead planned on going to Mom and Dad’s to celebrate with the Eurovision. However they themselves were in from Calum’s First Holy Communion in Wexford. I headed on afterwards to the George for the Eurovision. Never expected such crowds. Like it was described as “Four Paddy’s Day”. So I then headed to O’ Farrell where I was to meet Daniel whom I hadn’t seen since the Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat(Review here). So all in all, we couldn’t do anything. We were basically me anyways walking around for 3hrs. I was paying for it with my feet, and still am. I had thought about the Boilerhouse, but I’d need the cash for Dad’s Father’s Day gift or clothes in Penny’s. I then headed home and did the Eurovision Night on my TV. hahaah

Diary 3rd April 2015 – Good Friday

I met Emil for to see Seventh Son(Review here). I was still limping from walking 4hrs+ to and from Dundrum in the RAIN. D’Oh. Says I to meself, on the day that Christ died for your sins, my foot(BOTH), actually start to let me walk MORE comfortable. Kinda weird don’t ya think. ahahah. Hmmm weird if you ask me.

Diary 10th November 2014

PS This post contains NSFW content by means of sexual content.

I went to bed very late after looking at an emotional BUT very comical film The Worlds’ End(REVIEW here).

Shortly before I was shutting down Lappy, I was looking at the Catholic Church and World War 1. From my understanding, you couldn’t come out and be proud of your loved one being in the war or to say that your loved one faught for your country OR in Ireland’s case(as the country is NEUATRAL – which means we don’t fight in wars, we made a pact), The Irish joined the British Army to help out etc., etc.,

Mom rang me to say she has chips etc., for me. However with the “illness” – so called, I didn’t want em, so I lied through my teeth so. I didn’t wanna jepardise. Although when I was with my sis yesterday, I did have a chili overheat from Mom’s take out she had.

I was looking at a Porn flick while doing my junior(you know what I mean – hahahaa – my gay friends would know what I mean – heehheeh). I love a porn that has a story line or a simple plot. e.g a guy has been thrown out, and hence needs a place to crash etc., etc.,In this instance, the gay guy brought around 2 straight guys round. Claiming to them that a Tiffany would be round. The gay guy said the Tiffany loves em all tied up. The guys bought that, and hence got tied up. Then the gay guy did the sexual act of Blow job on each of em. The white guy in particular was of most homophobic, although the colored guy was no better. Anyways, the guys would say stuff such as faggot, you’re not sucking me, etc., etc., . The white guy was the most. The colored although he was homophobic, he in my opinion was actually enjoying it. But anyways as usual I get distracted. What I’m trying to say, these guys were actually the gay guy’s BULLY. The straight guys, were saying you’d have balls to let us go, cause we’re gonna really beat the shit out of you etc., etc., so the gay guy CLEVERLY says, there is a security tape, hidden but visible to the whole school if you touch me or even verbally abuse me etc., etc., HOW CLASSIC was that. I wish I had done that to my bully. So the gay guy says while the two are sucking him, “Who’s the faggot now”, they BOTH reply “Fuck you faggot”. Bottomline, lure your bully into a place, RECORD and then threaten to relasie the video if they go near you or whatever. I thought it was well acted out Porn(ASSUMING  of course it was acting).

Then shortly before I got up, I had a dream of whereby I was constantly pulling my sleeve. When I was younger BEFORE Inflatables existed in my life. I was constantly biting my sleeve. Its a habit, I had over in Romania. Perhaps the longing of my Mom of which I have a dedicated FB Page for her. Obviously for data privacy reasons, I haven’t anything incriminating mainly, cause I don’t have that information. Even if I did, I would respect her privacy. heeheh. But anyways, when I was in the orphanage, the nurses etc., saw that I was bighteing my skin on a consistence basis. So they gave me a rag to bite on. To this day 30 years, later, I still have the habit. Now while the sleeve, has reduced significantly, I still have urge alrite. BUT the Inflatables(obviously if I were to bite em, they wouldn’t be around for long – haahah). So to keep em, I just hug em to my delightful. heheeheh.


Former RTE Current Affairs Prime Time host, etc., has died. Joined RTE 1962. He covered 2 major Election coverage. ’73 and ’77. Oversaw for the first time a Taoeiseach conseeding to defeat. Current Affairs output for 40yrs. He covered such on 7 Days and Today, Tonight. . He provided commentary for ceremonial occasions such as State Funerals and JFK’s State Visit to the Republic of Ireland. Born in Manchester, moved to Ireland.

A MOCK referendum has been held in Catalonia, Spain to break away from Spain. Catalonians are wanting to be an Independent country, just liek the way Scotland tried doing September 2014 gone. A Court order was struck down, It has been said that Catalonia may NEVER be allowed to break away. But as it happens, It the referendum were to be held more than 80% would be in favor.

The Netherlands has held a Memorial Service today in memory of those who died in the MH17 disaster in the Summer 2014. All 219 perished in the disaster. Of which 193 were Dutch Nationals. 9 Are still UNACCOUNTED for currently.