Diary 20th December 2015

Today was quite a day, hahahah. As part of my usual self harm routine, I this time, went atop the old wound in the middle of the M. Throughout the day, it started paining me like a bitch.

So then afterwards, my sis came down for her weekly downloading. heheheeh. We had a great laugh. While she was downloading, I was putting up the Christmas lights for the outside. hahahaha. Twas most enjoyable. I was ecstatic today unlike last night. I was feeling crap. Then when I saw Sister Sister, I began to feel happy etc., Then afterwards, I then realsied that with the help of my sis, that I’ll be able to afford cash for tomorrow’s meeting at the very least Seamus. I hope to meet Seamus tomoz. So with the help of my sis I only realsied that IB(Injury Benefit) – as I was only paid a one week payment, will be paid into my bank account, I’ll withdraw that for myself, as SWA(Supplemental Welfare Allowance) will be lodged in during the week as part of the check, I received last week for the TWO week, including Christmas Week. And that payment will pay for my Rent for two weeks. So yeah, As Father Jack says: “I’m a happy camper”, haahaha.

So then we both headed on. We got takeouts, then afterwards onto her place. I was looking at the Annual Bumper issue of the RTE Guide, in which it has TV listings etc., for the Christmas period. I was marking off stuff I wanted to record. Then afterwards, there was a quiz in the magazine, in which I was testing my sis. We had a ball. I went extactic when I got two questions right in the quiz.

Following are the two questions that I went exstatcit over:

  • Which country won this year’s 60th Eurovision Song Contest. My sis said Russia and I said Sweden
  • This year’s Rose of Tralee represented which Irish county. My sis said Wicklow and I said Meath.

My sis googled the above two questions and everytime she showed a face. I just went excastatic my slapping the magazine on my head. As my baby Dane DeHanne who played Harry Osborne in Amazing Spiderman 2: “I don’t know how, I don’t why”. I most certainly NOT gloating. Like saying Oh you’re a looser or whatever. NOT my style. I just overreacted, I don’t know why. But one things for sure, I just got excited. hahah.

Then I headed back to my place. And would you believe it, I put the snowman in the Bathroom window. hahaha. Of course I left up the blind. Like who wants to see a guy taking a leak or taking a dump. hahaahah. I wanted to keep up  the idea of having ALL windows be advertised. I guess what am I trying to say, that I’ve never decorated my bathroom, which ain’t the done thing, as far as my folks are concerned. So I just put up my Snowman in the Bathroom and checked if the public on the street can see off the streets, however it wasn’t to be. That said thou, that the tenants beside me can see it when they pass my place all the time. hahaah.

Diary 19th December 2015

Today didn’t pan out the way I had hoped.

I was due to go into NARA(National Animal Rights Assocaition) leaflet handing of Christmas REcipes IDeas in St. Stpehen’s Green. However it wasn’t to be as the Alram never went off the time I wnated.So I saw the time being 13.42, I said that’s far too late. We were to meet at 1 and then they disperse. So yeah by the time I would have got in, I’d be lost.

My next plan was to go to Vegan Infomation Table in Westmoreland St., So that liekt he above reason didn’t pan out either.

Then the next plan was to meetup with Edmund, EVelyne and Glo aka Vegan Ireland at their usual stand, however that wasn’t to be.

So I then with all the above plans collapsing, I decided against getting stamps for teh Irish cards.

So then I slept on, had a hurrendous dream where my favorite character in Ros na Rún Séamus Mhicil Tom who is played by Diarmaid Mac An Adhaistiar gets killed with heating floors. I’m in a room, and the floor is over heating. I see someone noticing the bump on one of the floor tiles. So I see teh character. I shed several tears for him. Diarmaid himself thou passed on recenetly in July of this year. ANd for this year’s Christmas episodes, Ros na Rún will be laying Seamus to rest ie writeing him out of the series.

My sis called down with Mom, to hand me a takeout. heheeh.

So with that in mind, I eventually got up after such a horrendous dream as I said, then I did more self harming in the means of scraping the OTHER side of the letter ‘M’ I scraped on.

So then I got up and I got ready for the PLAN of the night. hahahaah. I was to meet Eoin and the gang for to see Star Wars: The Force Awakens(Episode VII). Although before hand I was to go to the Outhouse to go and see if I can see Joyce to hand her her card. However I had gotten Joyce and Severn mixed up, which was a shame, as I couldn’t give Severn his card. He was totally embarrassed thou, god love him thou. So then getting back to Star Wars, I was gonna go to Down to Earth, however it wasn’t to be as time wouldn’t be on my side. heheeh. I then headed to meet the gang. Then we all headed on up to the most aniticapted movie in the unvierse. heehehe

Diary 6th December 2015

Very mixed emotive feelings today. What I mean is that it all started off, just before I went to bed, I checked my Online Bank site, and I noticed that my Debt had been lowered from 100 to 30. So while I welcomed, this its not what I was promised or what I had expected more so. I had only gotten €70. Again I repeat, I am extremely worried about finance and cards etc., etc., and not forgetting pressies. and most imrportantly bills and Rent. That’s yet to be paid. My rent will be paid on the double. :(.

So then I got the sleeve(nothing new – awwwwww) and whatever way I did in terms of having at at it, my neck hasn’t been any better. So after my sleep, I woke up with a sharp pain in my neck. So then I woke up and got up for my First event of the Chrsitmas Season of concerts. Dublin Gay Men Chorus was to hold their Holly & THe Ivy concert in the Pepper Canister Church aka St. Stephen’s Church. So while showering, I heard my doorbell ring. NEver did I thiought that it was my sis. heheeheh. So I let her in and contitneud showereing.

I then headed onto the concert. While it was most enjoyable, I was disheartedned that it had no decoraitiosn let alone a tree nor a crib. There was a wonderful resoudning rendition of O Holy Ngiht. it was so emotive. I even got teary. I even asked my sis why this is so. heheeheh. My LUmy let me down big time. I had about 2GB on Phone and SD Memory. Yet it contitned to say to me that I was outta space. So as such some videos got corrupted. Stany was none too pleased. hahah. During the concert, I got a thtrought taht I just take as much Ibuprofen to stop the pain of my neck. It was that bad. I then in the thought, am asked by Beaumont or whatever by Phsyciatric Staff why did you do this. I tell em SOCIAL WELFARE. While at the concert, I was telling Patrick and Eddie whom I joined for the concert, that I along with Dad n my Sis used to go round to churche’s in the area, and look at cribs. Awww memeories.

On the way back to my sis from the concert, who was in my place, I stopped off at Supervalue in Talbot St., I was getting Christmas Cards for my mates on FB, and I noted €2.99 for TWO boxes ie €6. Hwoever the sales guy charged me €3 for both of em. When I broguht this issue to light a guy behidn me said some thing “….mate” as in don’t be questioning it or hurry up or wahtever. So fearing for my neck problem, I was on the constant look out BEHIND me up to the bike.

Then I came back to my palce, Went to Centra in Fairview then onto Four Star PIzza. I enquried abotu Vegan BAses, he didn’t understand. But he did know Gluten Free thou. So I contitneud onto my sis’ palce with herself of ocuse. Whiel at her palce, I was applying for a new AIB Card, as I had lost mine. Which I will need now as I don’t have a PIN Number anymore AND that I need to withdraw for myself, in terms of personal income. heehhe. I then also realsied that having a NEW Card number which I hadn’t reaslied this, that I will be able to use a NEW card for to use on PayPal. PayPal had blocked my old Card. My sis had told me that a friend of the family, had been in contact with my birth mother. and as such was advised that I stay away from my mother for father reasons. What I mean is that if I were to look for her, that she’d be beaten up or soemthing. Before going to bed last night, I had told my sis, that regarding the Aboration Referendum that may be coming along in the next Governetm, that if a woman, decides an aboration becuase of DS(Down Syndrome), I’m agaignst that. If a woman has an aboration becasue of FFA(Fatal Foetal Abnormality – No chance of life in or outside womb), that woudl be acceptable. BUT int he case of a woman being raped, teh mother wouldn’t want no contact with rapist, or attempt to grow a rapists’ child, BUT with the child…..Now where my mother comes in is that, I have come to terms(potatnetially) that my mother may have been raped and that the fahter don’t know. That she had the kid. Something to that affect.